I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
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