Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
