so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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