we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize