Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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