But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Randomize
