Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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