If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
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