that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
