Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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