who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
