It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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