Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
