Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
