is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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