Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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