white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Randomize