we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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