You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
