Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
they're like a gay fantastic four
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Did you pee in the oven last night??
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
