I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Randomize
