i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
