I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize