did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
