I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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