My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
