It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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