She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
