In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
