I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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