Sry I called you an 8
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
