YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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