Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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