I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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