4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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