Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
false alarm, still single
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