worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Randomize