Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
