i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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