pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
lol hangovers are for mortals.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
