i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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