Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
