Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
