Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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