We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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