I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
