another moral hangover. fuck.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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