yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
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