I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
