R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
